Scenario: Jack goes quail hunting before school, pulls into school > parking lot with shotgun in gun rack. > 1967 - Vice principal comes over to look at Jack's shotgun. He goes to > his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack. > 2007 - School goes into lock down, and FBI is called. Jack is hauled off > to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for > traumatized students and teachers. > > Scenario: Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school. > 1967 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up > best friends. Nobody goes to jail; nobody is arrested; nobody is > expelled. > 2007 - Police called. SWAT team arrives. Johnny and Mark are arrested > and charged with assault. Both are expelled even though Johnny started > it. > > Scenario: Jeffrey won't be still in class, disrupts other students. > 1967 - Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by the > principal. He returns to class, sits still, and does not disrupt class > again. > 2007 - Jeffrey is diagnosed with ADD and given huge doses of ritalin. > Becomes a zombie. School gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has > a learning disability. > > Scenario: Billy breaks a window in his neighbor's car and his Dad gives > him a whipping with his belt. > 1967 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to > college, and becomes a successful businessman. > 2007 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy is placed in > foster care and joins a gang. State psychologist tells Billy's sister > that she remembers being abused herself, and their dad goes to prison. > Billy's mom has affair with psychologist. > > Scenario: Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school. > 1967 - Mark shares aspirin with principal out on the smoking dock. > 2007 - Police called. Mark is expelled from school for drug violations. > Car is searched for drugs and weapons. > > Scenario: Pedro fails high school English. > 1967 - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college. > 2007 - Pedro's cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear > nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for > graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against state > school system and Pedro's English teacher. English banned from core > curriculum. Pedro is given a diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for > a living because he cannot speak English. > > Scenario: Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from 4th of July, > puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a red ant bed. > 1967 - Ants die. > 2007 - Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms, Homeland Security, and > FBI called. Johnny is charged with domestic terrorism. The FBI > investigates parents; siblings are removed from home; computers > confiscated. Johnny's dad goes on a terror watch list and is never > allowed to fly again. > > Scenario: Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. > He is found crying by his teacher, Heather. Heather hugs him to comfort > him. > 1967 - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing. > 2007 - Heather is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. > She faces three years in state prison. Johnny undergoes five years of > therapy.

A Family that Hunts together, stays together. (unless they leave me home!)